I Should Have Known
by ClinicallyInsaneAndDangerous
Summary: To lose your dear partner is a terrible thing. To get them back and then lose them again... it is unthinkable. PMD based
1. Chapter 1

**This will be a Two-shot (if I stop being lazy and actually write) and I'd like to thank my Beta, Slazer.**

* * *

I should have known.

Now when all the symptoms are smack dab in my face, when you're struggling to breathe through the fevers, and only now when your life is on the line I can finally see what should have been so obvious. Something I should have noticed right from the start.

Some of the pokemon from around Treasure Town say it's not my fault; that I couldn't have known. They say no one would have been able to tell what it was when your illness first started to show. After all, there hadn't been an outbreak for half a century now.

I know better though. Despite how strong you seemed to be I noticed that something was off a couple months ago, that you were acting odd. You were suddenly fatigued; you seemed to struggle to get yourself up in the morning for our tasks and at night you would gratefully collapse in your bed. I thought that it was the missions that we took, all the pokemon we had to find and the outlaws we were bringing in. Outlaws were always more difficult to defeat than the ferals we normally encountered.

I trusted that you would take less difficult missions if you weren't feeling well. I just couldn't bring myself to suggest it; it would be like an insult to you and I knew how seriously you took our job, how important our high rank was to you. It was the result of our blood, sweat and tears; our victories and failures. To even suggest that we should take an easier job would be a crushing blow to you, even more so if the reason was that I didn't think you were up to our regular ones. So I bit my tongue and said nothing.

A week later you seemed perfectly fine again, you were eating with gusto and you seemed to have an endless source of energy keeping you moving. It was almost humorous to see you acting like you had one too many Perfect Apples. We would always joke that they were the reason that Wigglytuff could be so cheerful and hyper all the time.

You were doing so well on our missions; taking down outlaws and ferals, even leveling up at an alarming rate. You constantly seemed so happy, it was contagious. Half of Treasure Town would start grinning whenever you looked at them. Everyone was just so happy... It kills me to think that you were forcing it. You were putting on an act to keep our friends from worrying. To keep me from worrying.

Yet here I am; sitting next to you as you fight for each breath, your body wracking with spasms as you lay drenched in a cold sweat. I'm tending to you now, alongside Sunflora and Chimecho. I've even caught Chatot occasionally checking up on you late at night when I step out to get a fresh bucket and cloth. Everyone is worried about you, you know? We may have moved out of the guild four years ago but everyone can tell that there has been a major decrease in cheer and motivation. Even Guildmaster Wigglytuff, the one you would refer to as the resident 'Energizer Bunny', seems quieter and more subdued.

It was only a month ago that it became apparent to everyone that you were unwell, and no matter how you tried to hide and deny it we all could tell. You tried to avoid telling us how you were feeling and how long you had been this way. I can clearly recall the shock on everyone's faced when you finally admitted that you had been feeling under the weather for over seven months now. I still can't fathom how you could have hidden it from us for so long. It was obvious you were feeling horrible, and even at that point you were still trying to act strong. As much as I admired your strength for holding on so long I couldn't help but to feel hurt that you had hidden something like this from me. Why did you? Why didn't you tell anyone?

The answer is obvious but all the same I can help but to wonder sometimes. Right from the start you never spoke more than was needed, you always preferred to show support by your actions. For me it was more than enough just having you by my side during our adventures.

When I lost you the first time I was heartbroken. When Dialga gave you back to me, to this world, I promised myself that I would never take your presence for granted again. I broke my promise. I know this now, and this time I'm not sure if I will ever get you back should things take a turn for the worse. And at this point I'm not sure if there is anything worse. Maybe death, but I pray to Arceus that you will make it through.

The thing that really bites is that this could have been avoided. If I had only been watching my back you wouldn't have had to take that blow for me. That Electrike wouldn't have made contact with you if I had only been paying attention. You wouldn't be sick right now.

I can picture you response if I had told you that, you would have tried to redirect the blame onto yourself. Yeah, its electric attacks would have really hurt but I wouldn't have gotten sick, only you would.

It seems that I had taken something else for granted as well; the fact that you are a pokemon. I never once thought about our differences. Not just species but the other differences between us. I was born in this town in the Chansey daycare, and even after the team that had brought my egg there decided that they didn't want me on their team I still hung around the area. It seems that even from a young age I had wanted to be an explorer.

I guess that even though you told me from the start that you were human in a pokemon body that a small part of my still thought that you had been born into this world. It's clear now that I had mistakenly assumed something that wasn't true, and you were now paying the price for it. A simple vaccination could have prevented this, one that I had gotten as a hatchling, one that every non feral hatchling has gotten, and one that each new team member has to get. You are sick with something that only a feral can carry.

Honestly I don't know what I'd do if I lost you again. It's painfully obvious that with each day, with each hour, you are getting steadily worse. No one knows what to do. If we had caught this earlier there would have been treatment, but at this point…

Nobody wants to give up on you, I know that, but it seems that every one is preparing themselves for the worse. I don't know if I can do that. You were just so strong… And giving up on you now seems disrespectful. You never gave up on me. You always helped me get past my weaknesses and move past my shortcomings. I don't want to give up on you but I'm at a loss for what I can do to help you. For now I will have to settle with tending to your needs.

It's kind of funny whenever we used meet new teams and they thought I was the Team leader. I might have turned into the powerhouse but you were the one with a true talent for exploration. It never ceased to amaze me that you'd be able to locate an outlaw, a certain item, where our employer was, or even the next stair case the moment you would step into the new floor. Out of the two of us you were the one meant for exploring and it was obvious from the start that despite your naturally meek disposition that it the team leader would be you.

It seems that even feral know this. Whenever a feral asks to join Team Radiance it's always you they look at for the answer, it's always you that they want to be on the team with. I don't think any feral I've ever beaten has asked to join our team. And I honestly don't know if our team can survive without you.

Team Radiance wouldn't be the only thing to take a massive blow if you were to go. When you first disappeared everyone was affected, not just the guild. It was like every life you came into contact with during your stay here was hit hard. Sure they were able to get back into the swing of things after a week or so, but even then there seemed to be an empty spot in all of our lives. Things only returned to normal when Dialga gifted us with your return. I don't think you ever truly understood how different things were when you were gone.

All I know now is that I couldn't survive losing you again. Not to Dialga, not to Darkrai, and defiantly not to Pokerus.

And all I can think of while I stay by your side is that I should have known.

* * *

**I came up the concept today on the train out of the city. I was playing my PMD Explorers of the Sky game when my main charater kept getting burned, poisoned, confuse etc. one every single floor. Just from the dialogue the main character seems rather quiet. And from they way he/she handles their fate of dissapearing kind of makes me think that they are a sufferer. The kind that no matter how much pain they are in will keep it to themself until the end or when it just becomes too much to hide.**

**The pokemon I play as in my PMD: EoS is a Turtwig and her partner is a Totodile. He tends to deal more damage on a regular basis than she does, and for some reason no matter which path I take in game it either leads to the missing pokemon, the missing item or the stairs. So I actually based alot of this on the game play.**

**Yeah, I know Pokerus isn't actually a bad thing in the games but for the sake of this story it is. **

**.... So did any one reading this figure out it was Pokerus before the second to last line? No lying please~**

**Read and please reveiw!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Whoot! Finally got this done! **

**I don't own pokemon (I wish I did )**

* * *

I'm sorry.

I really am.

We've been through so much… guild training, saving the world, fighting legendaries… We've done so much together. We've relied on each other for so long, and that's why it pains me to keep this from you.

I'm sick, Vision.

It's not that bad right now, my joints hurt and I'm not that hungry, but for some reason I know it's only going to get worse. I know I'm not going to get better. And I know that if I let you know you'd have our team retire. Or at least hand over the main duties to some of our team mates.

I don't want that.

You'd be miserable. You'd pretend to be fine (oh the hypocrisy), and say that you didn't mind, that taking care of me was more important. Exploring is your life's passion and I couldn't take that away from you. I just couldn't.

Please forgive me for being selfish. I know that some time in the near future, whether it be two months or two years, I will leave you alone for a second time. Permanently, and all I want is to spend as much of the time I have remaining doing the thing we both love.

So I'll grit my teeth (figuratively speaking, I have none) and swallow the discomfort. I'll put on a brave face and look forward to each and every mission we will complete, every moment that we'll be together.

I promise I'll hold on as long as I can for you.

* * *

I'm sorry.

It's getting harder, Vision.

I'm trying, I really am, but it's getting harder to hide it from you.

I've noticed your concerned looks as I struggle through our jobs, your worried face as you watch me fall into bed each night. I know you want to take it easy for me, but that wouldn't be fair to you.

You worked so hard to make it this far, everyone says we're the best, and grew so much. Looking at you now it's almost impossible to picture you as the unconfident Totodile that woke me up on the beach all those years ago. You put in everything you had to get us to Master Rank and I can't bring myself to do jobs that would be 'too easy' for our rank.

You have so much faith in me, believing that I'd take a break if something really was wrong and because of that you wouldn't say anything. You were worried for me but you trusted me more. I'm sorry for betraying that trust. I'm sorry that I'm concealing this from you.

I'll try harder. I won't let you worry.

* * *

I'm doing it. I'm doing it.

You've finally stopped worrying, and think everything is back to normal. You're so proud about how well our Team is doing. I'm proud too.

I'm getting stronger, kind of. I'm leveling up at an unbelievable rate, outlaws are a cinch to defeat now, and you couldn't be happier.

I'm getting sicker too, though.

Not only am I fatigued all the time now but my health in the dungeons is also suffering. It's like being poisoned, but not being able to cure it by eating a pecha berry or moving onto a new floor. Quite frankly it makes hiding this from you much harder. Relearning Mega drain from Electivire helped though, and that technique has become a crutch for me. I'm using it at least once on every floor, sometimes more.

You're just so happy right now… I want to do everything in my power to keep it like this for you.

I'll continue to pretend for now. I'll put on a big smile every morning and go through the day with an even bigger one. I'll do anything to extend this period of happiness for you, anything.

I just hope that you'll forgive me one day for deceiving you like this.

* * *

Everyone knows now.

You know.

It…It just got too much to bear, I'm sorry.

I can't go on missions any more, you won't let me. You won't leave my side either. I'm sorry for not being stronger. I'm sorry that I'm going to leave you soon and that I can't bring myself to even let you know that.

I won't give up, though. I'll keep trying to keep your mind off what is really happening, I'll try to disguise the truth for a little bit longer.

* * *

… I don't regret anything Vision; I want you to know that. I cherish everthing. But above all, I'm thankful to have known you. There is no pokemon that could have taken your place, no other pokemon I would rather have been with. I'm glad that I got to watch you grow and proud that I had helped you along when things got rough. You are my irreplaceable partner, and I can only hope that you think of me the same way.

I can't move now. Not even to open my eyes or speak. I can't tell you how I feel, how important of a friend you are to me. I'm always listening to you when you visit and I'm sorry that I'm not able to let you know that. It's really hard to stay awake, but I'm determined to hear everything you have to say to me. I don't care much for when our friends visit (Even though Chatot's concern took me by surprise) and I prefer to sleep then, just so I can stay awake to listen to you.

I'm glad that you've been taking missions again, even if it means that you have less time to visit me. It's nice to hear you recall each job at the end of the day, you seem so much happier and it's good to know that you won't give up on your dream. It gives me hope that you might be able to move on, that you'll keep doing what we both loved to do.

I'm left to my thoughts more often now, well… when I'm not asleep that is. I've had a lot of time to think and if I could... If I could have one more thing… I'd want to spend another day with you. Even if it was just to be in each other's company, I'd like that. I wish you knew that I'm still awake...

* * *

Vision?

Where are you?

I… I can't hear you…

Where did you go? Where is everyone? I can't hear them.

… Where did the waves go? The sea's right outside out room… Why can't I…?

Oh.

Is… Is this the end?

Vision! Vision where are you?

I don't want to leave yet! I don't want to die! Not alone! Not alone…

It's almost funny how I'm wishing to feel something, anything… A few months ago (I suppose it's a few months… It's hard to tell time when you're virtually comatose) I would have given anything to get rid of the aches and pains that plagued me. Now I'm even missing the feel of the straw that lines our beds. I miss a lot of things right now.

Heh, I just realized something… I'm a vegetable. Me, a grass type, in a vegetative state, how funny is that (in a sick twisted way)? I'm literally a vegetable.

… Well, I guess it's not that funny, but you don't have a lot of material for jokes when you're in my position. Or much of a reason to make jokes in the first place.

…

…

Why? Why me?

I saved the world! Twice!

Vision and I could take on legendaries and come out victorious!

We went to the future and survived!

I even disappeared and came back. I stopped existing and still managed to return to Vision.

So why?

Why me?

Why not-

…

…

No.

NO.

It's better off being me. It really is. I take all of that back.

Otherwise it'd be Vision in my place. I don't want that. I'd never want that.

I'm sorry Vision. I'm sorry.

* * *

Something's different. I feel different.

Not good, not bad. Just…

Vision! I see you! I'm really seeing you!

Vision?

What's wrong Vision?

Why are you... Oh.

OH.

I'm…. I'm sorry…

I didn't mean to… I didn't want…

D-don't cry… please don't cry Vision.

_I'm sorry that I can't comfort you when you really need it._

You'll be okay. You'll still go on missions, right?

_I'm sorry that I can't go on any more with you._

And… and you'll keep the team together. Don't let our third level Master rank go to waste. We both worked for so long to get there, don't throw it away.

_I'm sorry that I can't help you raise our rank any more. _

You know that you're my best friend right? My partner in crime (or stopping crime as it may be), the most important person in my life, and best buddies through thick and thin. You know all of this right? You have to…

_I'm sorry that I've never been able to tell you how much you mean to me. Best friends forever, Vision. Best friends forever._

I'm sorry.

* * *

**Double WHOOT. ^^ **

**I'm extending this again, and I'll be putting up a third and final chapter. Don't know when, but I'll get around to it.**

**Big thanks to my Beta reader!**


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